Saturday, November 2, 2013

Saturday Morning Reflection: November 2nd

On this day, the morning of All Souls, the sky is dark and the air chilly. Awake since 5:00 am (for absolutely no reason), I set time aside to think of the past week.

It was a long week. LONG. The Halloween candy did not help. I am ready to ban all sugar until Christmas. The kids love it though, don't they? Halloween, I mean, not just the candy. I love the enthusiasm and the excitement of dressing up, but that is about it.

The kids wanted to do a Star Wars theme. I took the easy way out and bought costumes. I love to create, but this year... no time, no energy, and I did not want the stress. Guess what? They are still so cute and could care less whether an outfit is bought or homemade.

On Health... Since I have blogged about it before, I will give a quick update. The headaches? So much better, especially now that the hormones are stabilizing. Some of it was a result of breaking the headache cycle, some of it was physical therapy and continued stretching, some of it was diet change, some using the right kind of medicine, and taking daily magnesium (800-1200mg/day).

Do I still have headaches? Yes, but instead of near-daily migraines, I have had three BIG headaches since the end of August. By big, I mean days on end of pain or experiencing hemiplegia (the stroke-like symptoms) or sudden, severe pain. So that is just plain wonderful.

Unfortunately, I still do not feel all that great. I am extremely tired. As in, abnormally tired, not just mom to four tired. I fall asleep if I sit or lay down, when I read to the kids, after only being up for an hour or so, and nearly when driving. Scary!

All basic workups are normal so that is nice but what's the deal? I have a sleep study to do in December. That should be loads of fun. And, the doctor seems to think I have asthma, which is totally new to me. I have been experiencing breathing "issues" for awhile now, especially since May when I almost called 911 while on vacation (yikes!). Most recently, I had an attack on Wednesday. Thankfully it was controlled soon but has left me out of breath since. The albuterol the doctor prescribed does not seem to do much.

All this to say, it is a vicious cycle of not feeling well, not being able to function normally let alone exercise, and it takes its toll.

The diet has been off so maybe it is contributing? So back to the Paleo diet (no eggs though). I have had the most success on this diet - as far as energy and healing stomach issues and feeling the best.

To Do Today... I need to hit the grocery store. Alone. I love my kids, but this momma needs some solo time after this week. I am not much of a shopper but I love to grocery shop. I love, love, love the produce section.

We also have some outside clean-up to do, and some calls to make to figure out who will be our propane provider for the new house.

Big News... Yep, the house is officially ours. After more difficulty than I would have liked, the lady seller finally signed and is in the process of moving out. She may even move out completely this weekend, but does have until next Saturday. We plan on moving in over Thanksgiving, woo-hoo! I am not rushing it though and we will move in small increments since it is just across town. Besides, we have carpet to replace and a few to-dos prior to moving in.

On Thinking... That I think too much. I want to say too much too, and that is part of my reason for silence (on here and in general). I have felt a need to remain quiet, a caution of using words too quickly and without thought. Words are powerful.

I am also in the middle of (finally!) reading The Secret Diary of Elisabeth Leseur: The Woman Whose Goodness Changed Her Husband from Atheist to Priest. I love it. If I were a highlighter type, nearly every word would be marked and I am not even 1/3 of the way in.

This book gives me hope, and a mission. You see, my husband was raised in the Catholic faith. Actually, in the parish and Catholic school right here in this town where we live, but he no longer practices. Not only that, but he is seeking out information to destroy all Catholic - heck, all Christian - theology. On one hand, I am glad that he is still searching and not totally apathetic, but on the other hand, it is so difficult to watch (and listen to). I cannot keep up with him in his search. He hops from one topic to the next, and has what he terms an open mind, but it's open to all things but the willingness to accept God.

All this to say, this is a stress of the heart, and many times, I feel too overwhelmed about it, that all I can do is pray and ask God to open his heart, that I trust he will come to know the faith again. I may have a horrible, non-debate oriented mind and memory, but I have a longing for him to know God, and that has to count for something.

In her journal, Elisabeth writes:
"What a woman so often lacks is true judgement, the habit of reasoning, the steady, individual working of the mind. Philosophy could give her all that, and strip from her so many prejudices and narrow ideas that she transmits religiously to her sons, to the great detriment of our country."
And, Jesus to St. Faustina:
 "Who God is in His Essence, no one will fathom, neither the mind of Angels nor of man. Get to know God by contemplating His attributes."
And so, I am slowly and painstakingly diving into whatever it is that that means. Philosophy and logic -- not me at all, but I love my husband and I love my children, who I know will one day look to their father and then ask more questions than they do now. For now, they pray too, sweet children.

On the lighter side... 

Yesterday, we had fun playing a cat and mouse game. The kids wanted to play over and over. One was the cat and the other mice, as they acted out the parts of the song, which Skipper and I took turns singing. Miss Bear really got into being a creeping cat. That girl is very physical.

Speaking of Miss Bear, see what we found hanging on the bulletin board at the dance studio last night:

Two delicious fall recipes: a creamy roasted red pepper soup (yum, yum!) and a fall tradition around here of gluten/dairy/egg-free frosted pumpkin bars. I guess I should have made them before today so I could have eaten a piece. Ah well...

And finally, a cute shot of a little girl who just loves the camera and to say, "cheese!"

God bless your week, and I hope to come on here more often.

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